


Desperation Is Never Pretty

by HalfshellVenus



Category: Prison Break
Genre: Beverage alert!, Crack, Gen, Humor, all-dialogue
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2009-03-05
Updated: 2009-03-05
Packaged: 2019-03-13 11:50:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 425
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13570008
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HalfshellVenus/pseuds/HalfshellVenus
Summary: AU Season 4 crack, which might be indistinguishable from the show at this point…





	Desperation Is Never Pretty

**Author's Note:**

> For [](https://prisonbreak100.livejournal.com/profile)[](https://prisonbreak100.livejournal.com/)**prisonbreak100** , this is "Hide."

x-x-x-x-x

"What the hell are you doing, Michael?"

"What does it look like? I'm working up a new disguise. And hand me that skirt."

"You can _not_ dress up as a woman."

"Yeah? Watch me."

"You have no _hair,_ Michael."

"That's what wigs are for."

"Oh, come on. Remember your baseball cap? We got ID'd within a week."

"Well maybe if _you'd_ made any kind of effort, we'd be rolling around in Westmoreland's money right now instead of hiding from the cops!"

"Still bitter, I see."

"Several million dollars bitter, to be exact. Not to mention doing time in Panama. _Central American prison,_ Lincoln—you have no idea what that was like."

"I guess I don't. But do you really see this working? I mean, you're six feet tall, Michael!"

"So I'll wear flats. We went through all this before, back at Fox River, and look how great it turned out. So have a little faith instead of being such a party-pooper. _Again_."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Show a little enthusiasm, _help_ a little even."

"I was on Death Row, Michael."

"Yeah, yeah—all I remember is you rubbing your head and moping around all the time, while I worked my butt off to spring you out of there."

"…"

"You're growling. I don’t see how that's helping, Lincoln. Now, do you have something different to put on? Because we're in a hurry, and you still look exactly like _you_."

"How _much_ of a hurry—when were you planning to leave?"

"Five minutes. I want to be out of this country by nightfall. We've got a new set of fake passports, and there's a fresh set of wheels waiting around the corner."

"What about Sara?"

"Forget Sara—I'm tired of being jerked around. First she's dead, then she's _not_ dead. The woman cannot commit."

"I hardly think that was her fault, Michael."

"Whatever. She's baggage, and we're on a short schedule. She can get on with her life, and work through her problems on her _own_ time."

"Harsh."

" _So_ not the time to be discussing this, Lincoln. Now throw your junk in a bag, so we can clear out of here."

"All right, all right. Though I'm definitely taking the booze—I can see I'm going to need it. Wait, is that _lipstick?_ "

"Passionate pink. Goes with the hair."

"Um…"

"Okay, finished. Grab that duffel there, and I'll meet you downstairs. Let me just—wait, what the—oh my _God_ … Does this skirt make my butt look big?"

" _Oh_ yeah. Like a Buick."

"Lincoln!"

 

_\----- fin -----_


End file.
